Wednesday, July 25, 2007

I'm in a strange mood

Strange things to ponder:
  • What if the hokey pokey really is what it's all about?
  • What if you're in hell, and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?
  • Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
  • Do witches run spell checkers?
  • Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
  • When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
  • When cows laugh, does milk come out of their noses?
  • When they first invented the clock, how did they know what time it was to set it to?
  • How come wrong numbers are never busy?
  • Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "asteroids"?
Now that I've got you thinking a little, here's some strange actual British signs (for your enjoyment, of course).
  • Spotted in a toilet of a London office: Toilet out of order. Please use floor below.
  • In a laundromat: Automatic washing machines: Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out.
  • In a London department store: Bargain basement upstairs.
  • In an office: Would the person who took the stepladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken.
  • In an office: After tea break, staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board.
  • Outside a secondhand shop: We exchange anything -- bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?
  • Notice in a health food shop window: Closed due to illness.
  • Spotted in a safari park: Elephants please stay in your car.
  • Seen during a conference: For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care on the first floor.
  • Notice in a field: The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.
  • Message on a leaflet: If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons.
  • On a repair shop door: We can repair anything. (Please knock hard on the door -- the bell doesn't work.)


At July 25, 2007 8:46 AM, Blogger Smalltown RN said...

oh i love those.....especially the last hubby would get a hoot out of that....

cheers my friend...hope life is treating you soon I hope....

At July 25, 2007 9:46 AM, Blogger susan said...

good ones! It must be raining there, or else you would be in the pool! Have a great day.

At July 25, 2007 10:24 AM, Blogger Rachel said...

Loved the signs!! Hope Sandy, Jimmy, and the rest have a safe trip! Enjoy the company!!

At July 25, 2007 8:38 PM, Blogger Nancy said...

And the British pride themselves on the proper use of the English language! :)

At July 26, 2007 5:52 AM, Blogger Val said...

Usually these kinds of lists contain things I've seen elsewhere. Not so this collection. Thanks for the laughs!

At July 26, 2007 6:33 AM, Blogger Alice said...

Loved the list, Motherkitty. Hope you're keeping well and not too hot. Sunny but cold here.

At July 27, 2007 1:03 PM, Blogger Sandy said...

Thanks for the laughs...we needed something to laugh about. Jimmy & I both enjoyed reading your lists together today.

At July 31, 2007 5:49 AM, Blogger Gwen said...

L.O.L loved it especially,
Broken Bell
The Teapot
Toilet{out of order}


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