Tuesday, December 13, 2005

George Carlin's Take On Aging and Life

My sister-in-law sent the following in an e-mail. I normally don't forward forwards, but I couldn't resist sharing this with all my lovely blogmates. Why? Because this epitomizes my philosophy on life. And, it is very funny and true.

So, sit back and enjoy one of my favorite comic's philosophical outpourings of truth as we know it.


Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

"How old are you?" "I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key.

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . . . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!" May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!


1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay "them."

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." And the devil's name is Alzheimer's.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9 Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.


Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

So, to all my favorite people, I send you my best wishes and those of Mr. Spock: Live long and prosper. And above all, enjoy each day and each other.


At December 14, 2005 5:20 AM, Blogger jellyhead said...

Thanks for that, Motherkitty - I think I needed a reminder of what's important in life. I have spent the day thinking about parenting decisions I've made with my son, wondering if I made a mistake in the past (regarding putting him in daycare 2 days a week at age 15 months). Therefore the part about not taking guilt trips really resonated with me. Ben is 3 now, happy at daycare (still just 2 days a week), and socially quite confident and gregarious. So I need to let go of these worries, because right or wrong, it's all in the past. Time to move forward, and concentrate on making the best parenting decisions I can from now on.

Whew! Who knew there were all those words in my head, just waiting to jump out. And on your blog, too. Sorry!

Have a wonderful Wednesday.

At December 14, 2005 7:20 AM, Blogger susan said...

George Carlin, classic. One of my favorites, also. Thanks for sharing.

At December 15, 2005 5:12 AM, Blogger jellyhead said...

Motherkitty, I hope this doesn't totally freak you out, but would you believe I had a dream last night that my family and I were staying at your home!! (now don't worry, we have no trips planned to the US and this is JUST A DREAM)
You were unwell (mycoplasma pneumonia, perhaps?!) and didn't actually ever appear in the dream except as a shadowy figure disappearing 'round the corner in a red and white dressing gown. Which makes sense since I have this nebulous sense of who you are as a person but no visual image, obviously.

Of course if you post a photo of midget-Motherkitty, I will forever imagine you at 4 years of age!


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