I got me my fix

Those Pretty Purple Pills

After only two doses of these, I feel almost human again. The Creature From The Black Lagoon has retreated to wherever it belongs and I have returned sans scales and fangs. Ah, the miracle of modern pharmaceuticals. Now it makes me wonder -- what COULD I have been thinking of to stop taking my HRT after reading some silly report on the CNN website?

As a result of my most recent mental aberration (brain fart, or as they call it here in the South, Early Onset of Old Timers Disease), I think I almost lost my mind.

A girlfriend once made this for me at a time when I was off work following surgery. I keep it to remind me how sometimes losing your mind is a good thing and that you can always get it back if you try hard enough and have the kind support of many (blogger) friends.


You never know how important your mind is to your wellbeing until you enter that netherworld of mental aberration after not taking your HRT for about a month.

As proof of my recent derangement, I offer to you, my gentle readers, a list of Strange English Language Definitions for your enjoyment.

Arbitrator: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's
Avoidable: What a bullfighter tries to do
Baloney: Where some hemlines fall
Bernadette: The act of torching a mortgage
Burglarize: What a crook sees with
Control: A short, ugly inmate
Counterfeiters: Workers who put together kitchen cabinets
Eclipse: What an English barber does for a living
Eyedropper: A clumsy ophthalmologist
Heroes: What a guy in a boat does
Left Bank: What the robber did when his bag was full of loot
Misty: How golfers create divots
Paradox: Two physicians
Parasites: What you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower
Pharmacist: A helper on the farm
Polarize: What penguins see with
Primate: Removing your spouse from in front of the TV
Relief: What trees do in the spring
Rubberneck: What you do to relax your wife
Seamstress: Describes 250 pounds in a size six
Selfish: What the owner of a seafood store does
Subdued: Like, a guy, like, works on one of those, like, submarines, man
Sudafed: Bringing litigation against a government official

Thank you, all my dear blog friends, for your kind words of support. Some of you have indicated that you've been there, done that. Others are not looking forward to the inevitable. I guess it's all part of being that wondrous creature -- a woman. We get to menstruate, we get to have PMS, we get to have the babies, we get to have the aggravation of raising the kids, we get to clean up all the bodily fluid messes, we get to have the empty nest syndrome when the kids leave home, we get to have chin hairs, grey hair, and sagging butts/breasts/bellies, and we get to have menopause when we're just starting to feel good about ourselves. Some days you just have to lose your mind to keep it all into perspective.